Troubles, they may come and go, but good times they're the gold. Steady as We Go - Dave Matthews Band I've been thinking about this lyric this morning, but instead of "troubles" I kept thinking "people". Some people enter our lives with such positivity that we cannot imagine they will ever leave our lives so abruptly... Continue Reading →
I am a firm believer in a woman never "asks for it." It doesn't matter her occupation, her manner of dress, or her behavior, if a woman is sexually assaulted it's not her fault. Period. End of story. As someone who feels so strongly about this, why do I blame myself when I get emotionally... Continue Reading →
Anxiety fucking blows. My anxiety is in overdrive right now. I put myself out there with someone and I feel like I am in a constant state of fight or flight. My muscles are tense, my stomach is in knots; I don't want to eat, my heart is beating faster, not racing, just faster. I... Continue Reading →
I never thought the year I turned 40, I would have to eulogize my husband. How do you write a eulogy for someone so young? He was only 42. I tried to remain as authentic as possible. I also had to keep it proper for the public. It was a difficult balance. I met Gregg... Continue Reading →
As a person with depression I tend to fall into a spiral where I ruminate on all my flaws. I cover my insecurities with self-deprecation and humor. I never want to come across as conceited so I tend to swing the pendulum to the other side and point out all of my self-perceived flaws. When... Continue Reading →
It wasn't perfect. Not even close, but it was ours and I miss it everyday. Especially the good stuff. I miss: The way he'd massage my back. Usually because he wanted sex, but sometimes just because he wanted to. Falling asleep with my leg touching his. His body heat, especially in the winter. The way he'd... Continue Reading →
A friend of mine sent an Instagram reel to me of Chris Rock's stand-up. Chris said, "Love hard or get the fuck out." This is a concise statement of how I want my next relationship to be. https://www.instagram.com/reel/CpDwQaQOtFb/?igshid=N2Q2MGM2OGQ%3D Love Hard or GTFO If you want me, show me. If you are not capable of that, then... Continue Reading →
I lost my virginity at the ripe old age of 18. I was more anxious about my first kiss (which occurred a week before my 18th birthday) than I was about losing my virginity. I figured out at a very early age how to give myself orgasms. I didn't know what it was at the... Continue Reading →
What a difference 24 hours makes (referring to yesterday's blog post vs today's). I have insomnia. I can fall asleep but wake-up after a couple of hours. I'll stay awake for 2-3 hours and fall back to sleep about an hour before having to get up. I actually prefer the nights when I wake-up and... Continue Reading →
Dating after loss is weird. It's nothing like the dating I did during open marriage time and separation phase. Probably because I was still attached to my husband and didn't take it seriously. This "real" dating is just fucking weird. When I first made an effort to start dating, I went in it with a... Continue Reading →
Lost in Resolute Reverie 