This week I've been on Momcation. My kids have been at their grandparents' house for Spring Break. In the past I enjoyed Momcations. My husband was still alive, and it gave us time to do things as a couple without the normal parental distractions. After about 3 days, I get really lonely; Momcations are not... Continue Reading →
Truth be told, I am angry as fuck that my husband died. Scratch that, he didn't die, he was killed. He was killed by some dumb fucking cunt that couldn't be bothered to look both ways. Apparently, the baby shower she was already late to was more important than making sure she didn't kill anyone.... Continue Reading →
At the start of the 'Pandemic times' the news constantly spoke about adjusting to a "new normal." Other than my kids being home from school and being unable to go out socially, I really didn’t notice much of a difference. I had been a stay-at-home mom for years. We had put in a pool the... Continue Reading →
I never thought the year I turned 40, I would have to eulogize my husband. How do you write a eulogy for someone so young? He was only 42. I tried to remain as authentic as possible. I also had to keep it proper for the public. It was a difficult balance. I met Gregg... Continue Reading →
It wasn't perfect. Not even close, but it was ours and I miss it everyday. Especially the good stuff. I miss: The way he'd massage my back. Usually because he wanted sex, but sometimes just because he wanted to. Falling asleep with my leg touching his. His body heat, especially in the winter. The way he'd... Continue Reading →
What a difference 24 hours makes (referring to yesterday's blog post vs today's). I have insomnia. I can fall asleep but wake-up after a couple of hours. I'll stay awake for 2-3 hours and fall back to sleep about an hour before having to get up. I actually prefer the nights when I wake-up and... Continue Reading →
Dating after loss is weird. It's nothing like the dating I did during open marriage time and separation phase. Probably because I was still attached to my husband and didn't take it seriously. This "real" dating is just fucking weird. When I first made an effort to start dating, I went in it with a... Continue Reading →
The day my husband died was like any other day. It was a Saturday, Labor Day weekend. He was a longshoreman (a ship-to-shore crane operator). He worked weird hours. He left for work before I woke up. We spent the morning texting each other about what we were going to do when he got off... Continue Reading →
It takes time to heal all wounds. It doesn't matter if the wound is physical, emotional, or mental. A wound is a wound. If it causes pain, distress, or discomfort, it's a wound. Everyone is different and experiences emotional and mental pain differently. A situation that may bother one person, may not bother another. This... Continue Reading →
Lost in Resolute Reverie 